[[MORE]] ♪♬♩ ~I don’t know why, but I feel like today has been the worst daaaaaay! There’s something in the air that makes me feel like nothing went my way~ ♪♬♩
Cosmo sex tip #367
glowpinkstah: cosmo-sex-tips: While having sex, suddenly stop before she reaches orgasm and say “And none for gretchen weiners, bye” and walk out of the room. I would kill.
calvinccandie: when i find myself in times of trouble mother mary comes to me speaking words of wisdom get your shit together
missindianajones asked: how many butts can you
if you think my posts are ridiculous you should see my life choices
cosmo sex tip #4
ponweiwest: while you’re undressing, seductively tell your partner you have a surprise. pull out a basketball from under the bed and throw it at your partner’s chest screaming “COME ON SLAM WELCOME TO THE JAM”
put some numbers in my ask
1: let's have sex
samyulle: don’t you hate it when you’re reading a chapter and then it’s coming to its climax and omg what’s gonna happen, then woops, your eyes dart to the last line and you spoil yourself and hate yourself for it
buriedluck asked: A-Z
atmyfuneral asked: Q U E S T I O N
Extremely Invasive Questions. GO.
A: Are you a virgin?
B: 3 biggest pet peeves
C: Celebrity crush?
D: If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?
E: Do you smoke?
F: Do you drink?
G: If you had to rank yourself on a scale of 1 to 10, what would you be?
H: Longest relationship and with who?
I: 5 turn ons
J: 5 turn offs
K: What's the biggest lie you have ever told?
L: Would you ever date someone of another race?
M: What is your sexual orientation?
N: Top 5 traits you look for in a person that you want to have a relationship with
O: Who are you crushing on right now?
P: Who is your bestfriend?
Q: Your guilty pleasure?
R: Who was your first kiss?
S: Do looks matter to you?
T: What kind of underwear are you wearing?
U: How big is your penis or for a girl, how big are your boobs
V: How far have you gone?
W: Do you like it when people play with your hair?
X: Are you circumcised?
Y: Do you name your private parts?
Z: What do you want to do when you grow up?
scrollingvaguelydownwards: theneverendingdrums: popcornmassacre: ugh summer look at my awful tan line #sinful stop the maths jokes guys, cos they’re not funny
byertfyord replied to your photo: Bless you, OkCupid. i can’t stop laughing. i have to reblog, like, reply and photo reply omg Hahahaha I’m glad you get some glee out of it. The funny shit is the only reason to have an OkCupid profile at this point.
sir-pimp-master-arthur: Have you every wanted to kiss someone really really badly But you can’t because they’re taken, not interested, too far away, don’t know you exist, or fictional
badcgijosh: If someone’s actually about to have a cow and all you can think to say is “don’t have a cow” you’re a shitty friend and they’re going to cross your name off their Christmas card list as soon as they get their butthole stitched back up
thedelicatediaries: Come Away With Me - Norah...
Cosmo sex tip #490
-thedevilandgod: Before you eat her out, say grace.
round-waterloo-underground: The Unholy duo of Canada get engaged. The good looking one in One Direction has a meltdown. Prince Harry nudes leak. Tonight is the night reaction gifs are made for.
franksroofing: k-martsmart: where can i illegally download some David Archuleta music 2007
thestorynotsofar: when i’m a famous porn star you’ll regret not reblogging my selfies
Plot Twist: We all lose our social anxiety and order our pizzas through the phone without hesitation and nervousness, we successfully greet everyone at family gatherings without jumbling up words and asking "how are you" twice, and we lose the habit of practicing to say our orders before saying it to the waitress.